Behold, I will send my messengers.
November 26th, 2006 by michael
War haunts our borders. Smoke chokes our skies. Tempests drown our shores. E. coli infests our spinach. The world of men crumbles as chaff before the gale, and as one mankind cries out for redemption.
The Lord has heard the lament of His children. As promised, the Lord has sent forth His anointed.
Don’t get too excited. The Lord is still saving the Son of David, who may or may not have been here before, for a rainier day.
But He has sent to His people prophets, as it is written: “I will put my words in his mouth and he will speak to them all that I command him.”
A voice cries out in the blogosphere, prepare the way of the Lord.
That’s right. Michael and Chris have returned on the chariot of fire known only as the Kosher Eucharist, and this time, they’re on a mission from God.
Repent, sinners, for the time of reckoning is upon you.
Michael and Chris have been on the mountain. They have heard the Word. Ho, let he who thirsts come to the waters and drink of them and be sated with sarcasm and profanity. And let the wicked and those who forsake His way taste only the briars and nettles of reproach, and face the whirling abyss of scorn.
That’s right, bitches.
We’re back.
Posted in we love puppies | 4 Comments »
December 12th, 2006 at 6:12
OK, preface: I started reading KE back in the day before Michael hooked up with the Jewlicious crew (it was the Ann Coulter pie throwing “terrorism” piece that got me, I still think of it from time to time, very well written BTW) and enjoyed the Catholic/Jewish views. Being raised Catholic but becoming Jewish as an adult, it was hilarity all around for me. So tonight after probably a year of not having been on Jewlicious, I see something is cross posted in Kosher Eucharist, and lo, the mighty have risen again! Woohoo!
December 12th, 2006 at 8:09
Well, we are so glad you’re back! If you want the Ann Coulter piece, I think Mikeleh has it archived somewhere – he calls it the “wayback machine.”
December 14th, 2006 at 19:53
No, the Wayback Machine is an Internet archive service that caches pages. But only a fraction of the old KE is on it.
The archives actually do exist locked somewhere in our old server, and someday we’ll dig them out.
December 15th, 2006 at 3:05
It’s funny because I don’t understand technology.